Vernon Danforth's Great Leap Forth!
by backpack bootswiper map
Summary: Vernon Danforth a boy goes on a pokémon adventure with his best friend, a shiny eevee ! Will they beat the Eilte 4? (There maybe Human x Pokemon lemon later so that is why it is rated M)
1. A BRIGHT ADVENTURE BEGINS!

AUTHOR'S NOTE! HERE IS THE STORY OF VERNON, WHO WANTS TO BEAT THE ELITE 4. ON THE POKEMON ADVENTURE ON HIS WAY, HE WILL DISCOVER MANY NEW THINGS ABOUT HIMSELF... STAY TUNED AND PLEASE READ AND REVIEW :D THIS STORY IS A GIFT FOR BACKPACK I LOVE YOU BABY, I KNOW EEVEE IS YOUR FAVORITE POKEMON XXX

* * *

"Eevee I love you" Vernon said, holding the small pokemon tight inside his trembling arms.

Eevee was the rarest and best Pokémon, everyone wanted an eevee and you can make them evolve into a lot of beautiful Pokémon. His eevee was more special than all the eevee because it had a pedigree, from the breeder specifically as ordered by Prof. Oak. He had saved up all of his allowance for this magnificent creature.

But this Eevee was even better than all the Eevees, it was shiny when it came out of the egg. Vernon had spent a lot of time caring about the Eevee, which is why when it first came out of an egg the first thing it saw was Vernon. That is why the Eevee thought that Vernon was their parent, like in the psychological theory of Imprinting by Konrad Zacharias Lorenz.

"Lets go fight a lot of bad guys," he whispered to his friend the eevee. "We must also go beat the Elite 4, they are waiting for our adventure to learn a lot on the way."

"Eevee!" yelped the eevee with joy as it began to run forth into the street of pallet town. And then it turned across a corner so Vernon couldn't see it anymore. He ran looking for it

"Oh no come back eevee!"

Into the street that he turned to, he saw a garbodor but nothing else. "Garbodor," said the Garbodor as it slowly continued to walk forward.

A sexy girl came out from the street as well, and looked at him. "What is wrong" the girl said.

"WHERE IS MY EEVEE" Vernon sadly yelled.

"I don't know" said the sexy girl.

"It smells really weird" said Vernon wrinkling his nose, because garbodors smell very bad.

"Don't judge garboror" the sexy girl said. "It is ugly but it is also a wonderful pokemon and it is my boyfriend, we sleep with each other every night." The girl took Garbodor back into the ball.

"OH NO I KNOW WHERE YOUR EEVEE IS NOW" said the girl and when Vernon looked there was a pile of dead squashed meat under where the garbodor was once been.

"Oh no my Garbodor stepped on it" said the sexy girl. "I am so sorry my garbodor killed your eevee"

"NO! EEVEE" Vernon cried, tears coming out again as he remembered the horrifying, cruel death of his beloved friend.

"Out of sorry I will give you this Garbodor then," the sad trainer said, very touched by Vernon's plight. "His name is GARBORWOR, I am so sorry he killed your eeeve." She left the ball in his hand and walked away out of the street.

Vernon began to cry, because eevee was dead and now he can't beat the Elite 4 anymore if he has no pokemon, well actually he has garbodor.

"THE WORLD TOOK WHAT WAS IMPORTANT TO ME," he cried.

Wiping his eyes he said in the direction of the Elite 4 across the sky, "SO JUST YOU WAIT I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE."

* * *

TO BE CONTINUED PLEASE FOLLOW THE STORY BECAUSE I WILL UPDATE SOON! THE MORE REVIEWS THE MORE I WILL WRITE, AND TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT TO HAPPEN TO VERNON IN THE STORY I WILL TAKE ALL OF YOUR SUGGESTIONS :D


	2. A NEW FRIEND!

HEY SWIPER. NO SWIPING THANK YOU FOR REVIEWING SO FAST! OKAY AS YOU REQUESTED, THERE WILL BE A BABY! IT WON'T HAPPEN IN THIS CHAPTER BUT IT WILL BE SOON. EVERYONE ELSE WHO WANTS TO MAKE SUGGESTIONS PLEASE DO IT ALSO! I AM LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR SUGGESTSIONS :D NOW WITHOUT FURTHER ADO LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENS TO OUR ASPIRING YOUNG TRAINER, VERNON WHO SUFFERED HORRIFIC A BEGINNING IN HIS ADVENTURE.

* * *

His best friend was dead. Vernon walked through pallet town so depressed. Then a sexy boy came up.

"What is wrong" said the sexy boy.

"MY EEVEE IS DEAD I HAVE NO POKEMON, actually I have garbodor but that doesn't count"

"I am sorry" said the sexy boy. The sexy boy is actually Lance, of the Elite 4, but Vernon didn't know this. "Do you want to beat the elite 4" said Lance.

"I want to beat the elite 4! But I have no pokemon" Vernon cried. "My eevee is dead, and GARBORWOR does not count" as he continued to cry into the dragon type leader's shoulder which was burly and chiseled and like a dragon's.

"There there" said Lance as he got a dragonite to carry him and Vernon into the sky; They landed in a clearing in the middle of the forest, the sexy boy put down Vernon.

"Look at me" Lance said with his sexy eyes.

"MY eevee is dead" Vernon cried

"Look at my dragonite though" the sexy boy said. And Vernon looked at the dragonite.

"Have sex with my dragonite and I will give you twenty bucks" suggested lance

"That will not help me get back my eevee" Vernon cried.

"But it will help you beat the elite 4."

"really?"

"Yes I promise." So Vernon closed his eyes because Lance gave him a pill that made him forget everything and not hurt. When he woke up again he was inside the pokémon center, Nurse Joy looked tearfully into his eyes.

"You are pregnant," she said.

* * *

OH NO! FOLLOW THE STORY TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT, AND LEAVE A REVIEW FOR SUGGESTIONS!


	3. THE BABY!

AUTHOR'S NOTE AGAIN AHH I AM SO EXCITED I GOT AHEAD OF MYSELF AND POSTED ANOTHER CHAPTER! But no one left a review on the previous one yet :( IF NO ONE REVIEWS THIS I WON'T BE ABLE TO CONTINUE! PLEASE REVIEW... I AM RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS, THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT TO ME! GO GO VERNON, WE ALL WANT YOU TO SUCCEED

* * *

"PUSH PUSH" said Nurse Joy.

Vernon cried out in terror and pain in the labor.

"I know it hurts but keep on pushing" she directed him.

"Thank you Nurse Joy" Vernon cried as he kept pushing.

There was a lot of blood everywhere, but there was the baby!

First the baby came out, there was still an umbilical cord so Nurse Joy clamped it and then cut it between the clamps, so it would not bleed. She took some samples out of the umbilical cord blood to make a donation to pokemon researchers other than Prof. Oak who wanted stem cell research funding. And then the placenta came out, because it meant that the pregnancy was finished.

The baby was a dragonite/human mix! It had less hair than a human, it had wings, it cried gently when it came into the world. Vernon held it in his arms, now he was a father!

"What is your baby's name" asked Nurse Joy with joy.

"Dragnon…?" the tired new father said.

"Okay perfect!" Nurse Joy said as she registered the name on the birth certificate.

Three days later Vernon got to go out of the hospital, and now he had a new friend, his name was Dragnon and it was his baby. It took many stitches to stitch the hole in his underneath place where the baby had come out, but it was worth every bit of it, this is the meaning of love to endure pain for the ones you care about.

Now Vernon felt more confident about fighting the Elite 4, because even though eevee was gone he still had Garbodor, and now he had Dragnon too. The only thing missing was that Dragnon was not shiny, otherwise he would have been perfect.

"Daddy," Dragnon said.

"Yes my son, we are in this together!" Vernon said to Dragnon.

"Dragnon dragnon" Dragnon said encouragingly.

Vernon was happy, but a pang entered his heart and he started to cry again, because he remembered Eevee, his first love the one who was now dead. Even if he was happier now, nothing could replace his shiny eevee. So he looked at the sky, and said, "ELITE 4 I WILL BEAT YOU, JUST YOU WAIT" and all this, it was for his one true beautiful eevee.


	4. MYSTERY OF THE HEAT ROTOM

HEY SWIPER. NO SWIPING, YOU ARE THE BEST FAN. I'M SORRY I DIDN'T GET TO INCORPORATE MATERNITY CLOTHES, BUT HE CAN DEFINIITELY GET CLOTHES FOR DRAGNON BECAUSE DRAGNON IS HALF HUMAN AFTER ALL, SO LIKE A HUMAN BABY HE DOES NEED CLOTHES TOO. I LOOKED AT YOUR LATEST SUGGESTION BUT UNFORTUNATELY I DON'T THINK THAT I CAN DO SOMETHING SO COMPLICATED, IT'S NOT EXACTLY WHERE I WANT TO GO :/ BUT I CAN INCORPORATE A MICROWAVE AT A VERY LEAST. I HOPE THAT IS OKAY.

ALSO HI TO ANON REVIEWER, dromarama, TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTION VERNON IS ON A QUEST FOR POKEMON AND TO BEAT THE ELITE 4, AND RIGHT NOW HE NEEDS TO AVENGE THE DEATH OF HIS BEST FRIEND EEVEE.

* * *

First, Vernon had to do an important mission, though, before he could keep fighting the Elite 4. He needed to find clothes for Dragnon, because Dragnon was his son and half human so like a baby human he does need clothes too.

He went to Goodwill, because he only had twenty bucks that lance gave him, of course he didn't know it was Lance who had given it to him, just that it was a sexy boy. There are many types of goodwill stores, but the best type of Goodwill store is the outlet store, because there the things are even cheaper than in regular goodwill stores and you can buy a lot of clothes very cheap, you take it out and they weight it by the kilograms so there is not even a price per piece of clothing, just the weight. Since baby clothes don't weigh a lot that means it is even cheaper for Vernon to find clothes for Dragnon.

He began to dug into a bin of clothes, "Dragnon Dragnon" said his son from his shoulders where he had carried him, and Garbodor was in his belt pocket. He had his eye on a really nice baby shirt the size of Dragnon when suddenly another lady snatched it up from him before his eyes!

"This is my baby clothes!" said the sexy woman.

"No, I had my eyes on it first!" he cried. And then he began to sob because everything was going bad, first his eevee died, then he couldn't go on his quest for a while because he was in the hospital pregnant with Dragnon.

"I need it for my adopted son!" said the sexy woman. "My wife and I have like no money! This is the first piece of clothing that looks okay for my son!"

"Oh I am so sorry" Vernon said sadly, holding Dragnon to his arms. Then he sadly walked away.

Where could he get more pokemon, he thought, to avenge my baby Eevee. If I was stronger I could have fought the woman with a pokemon battle, except Dragnon is my son and I do not want him to get hurt, and Garbodor doesn't count it killed eevee.

That is when he saw a bunch of people screaming.

"IT'S HAUNTED" they cried.

He ran where the people were screaming, and he saw one sure weird looking microwave on the table with the appliances.

"What is wrong with this microwave?" he asked the spectators who seemed frightened.

"IT'S MOVING! IT'S MOVING!" they yelled and sure enough he saw a glow in the microwave that was now floating in the air. This was actually a Heat Rotom, and is Electric/Fire type.

"EVERYONE GET AWAY!" Vernon yelled, pulling out an empty pokeball and throwing it expertly through the air and catching the Rotom.

The ball fell back on the counter. Everyone applauded, and Vernon felt like a hero.

Then the cashier lady walked in. "You still have to pay for the microwave," she said. "Its $14.38."

So now Vernon had $5.62 left, and a Heat Rotom! He walked out of Goodwill, and thanked the sexy boy whose name he didn't know, in his mind.

* * *

WHOO, CHEER ON VERNON! EVEN IF EEVEE IS DEAD HE NOW HAS 3 POKEMON! HE IS GETTING EVEN CLOSER TO THE ELITE 4 NOW!


	5. RUMOURS OF A LEGEND

HEY EVERYONE!

SWIPER. NO SWIPING, THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONTINUED PATRONAGE. NO, I DO NOT WANT VERNON TO BECOME A BAD DRIVER BECAUSE VERNON IS TOO YOUNG TO DRIVE, AND ALSO TOO YOUNG TO DRINK BECAUSE THE STORY MUST STAY REALISTIC. BUT I SORT OF INCORPORATED THE IDEA, I HOPE THIS IS OKAY WITH YOU IN THE WAY IT HAPPENED! EXCEPT IF YOU DON'T MIND, I DON'T MEAN IT IN A BAD WAY I PROMISE, I PREFER IF YOU CAN TRY TO GIVE ME OTHER TYPES OF IDEAS, BECAUSE FOR THE LAST WHILE THERE IS NO IDEA THAT I CAN DO DIRECTLY :/ CAN YOU PLEASE THINK HARDEr?

I WOULD NOW LIKE TO SAY HI ESPECIALLY TO BACKPACK, BECAUSE EVEN IF YOU DID NOT REVIEW RIGHT AWAY, I WROTE THIS FIC FOR YOU AND FINALLY YOU REVIEWED, THANK YOU! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, BAE, I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS AND TELL ME WHAT I CAN DO TO MAKE THIS SPICIER IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN ;)))0 LOVE YOU MY LOVE HEHEHEHEHE, EVEN IF YOU ARE NEVER AS GOOD AS SWIPER, BECAUSE THAT'S OKAY YOU SHOULD ACCEPT YOURSELF AS WHO YOU ARE!

DEAR ANON dromarama, I HOPE YOU ARE READING THIS WHEREVER YOU ARE! I LOVE YOU TOO! XOXOXO

WHY ARE NOT MORE PEOPLE REVIEWING :'(

* * *

As he walked out of the Goodwill store, Vernon was feeling pretty good about himself. That is when he saw a poor old man on the floor beside a garbage can.

"What is wrong, old man?" he said.

"Please spare me some change" cried the old man. "I am homeless."

"I have $5.62 left," said Vernon, "but how do I know whether or not I should give this money to you? I might need it for my pokemon journey."

"I beg you, I beg you please! I am a drunk driver," the old man said while he was crying. "One day I hit a little boy on the street with my car, and after that I went to jail and then now I am trying to run from jail…. My life is in ruins, I don't know what to do anymore with my life."

"Do you have any advice for the Elite 4?" Vernon asked, a little impatient that the old man was talking so much about his personal life that was boring.

"I killed the little boy," the man continued. "He was squashed to death under the truck! Oh, no one will look at me now, no one cares about me now and I deserve to die."

"My eevee was squashed to death by a garbodor too" Vernon sympathized. "I am so sorry." Then he began to cry, again.

"Please give me some money," asked the old man as he cried too.

"Please help me beat the elite 4, I am doing it for eevee" cried Vernon.

"I know what I can do to help you," the old man said while rummaging in his pants pockets with a hand. "I have a magical dragon stone."

"What will I do with a magical dragon stone," Vernon asked?

"With the magical dragon stone, you can awaken the legendary beat that will help you in anything."

"Okay I will give you my $1.54 in return for the magical dragon stone," said Vernon.

"No that is not enough!" begged the old man.

"What about $3.62?"

"no I need more money please, I have emphysema"

"I am so sorry," Vernon cried. "Okay I will give you all of $5.62."

"Thank you so much" said the old man while he handed Vernon the magical dragon stone that looked a lot like a normal dirty old rock, except this rock had the power to summon the legendary dragon. "I believe in you my son" said the old man with gentleness in his eyes.

"Thank you for the magical dragon stone," Vernon said. "My son agrees."

"Dragnon!" agreed Dragnon.

"Thank you for the $5.62, you can accomplish anything!" the old man said.

Vernon continued on in his adventure, with 3 pokemon including the half pokemon son, the magical dragon stone, and more belief in himself and confidence than he ever had.

* * *

NOW COMMENT TO TELL ME WHAT KIND OF LEGENDARY BEAST WILL AWAKEN, I HAVE NOT YET MADE A CHOICE AND THE STORY DEPEDNS ON YOUR INPUT!


	6. THE FIRST BATTLE!

HEY EVERYONE AGAIN THANK YOU FOR THE REVIEW SORRY FOR NOT WRITING FOR SO LONG I MISS ALL OF YOU I HOPE YOU ALL MISS ME TOO XOXOXOXOX, THANK YOU EVERYONE WHO IS FOLLOWING THE STORY CONSCIOUSLY OR SUBCONSCIOUSLY BECAUSE I KNOW THAT YOUR BRAIN CELLS THINK OF ME AT NIGHT IN THE DARKEST HOUR OF THE DARKNESS XXXXX

VERNON IN THIS CHAPTER WILL HAVE HIS FIRST BATTLE! SEE WHAT HE CAN DO WITH HIS NEW POKEMONS! AND ALWAYS, READ AND REVIEW, MY GOAL IS 10,000 WORDS AND 25 FAVES AND 100 REVIEWS IF YOU CAN HELP CONTRIBUTE YOU ARE THE BEST YAY, SO FAR I ALREADY HAVE 12 REVIEWS AND NO FAVES THOUGH BUT I WILL KEEP WRITING, I WILL NOT GIVE UP AS THEY SAY BECAUSE PERSEVERANCE WILL LEAD TO SUCCESS IN LIFE.

OKAY NOW WITHOUT FURTHER ADO ONTO THE ADVENTURE OF VERNON!

* * *

Vernon was walking all happy because of the dragonstone when he saw a gary suddenly walk up to him.

"DO YOU HAVE ANY MONEY" said Gary, who had spiky hair and was a famous hero.

"What no?" said Vernon. "But are you Gary? I AM SO EXCITED TO MEET YOU, YOU ARE A HERO AREN'T YOU."

"Shut up" said Gary. "Do you have the shinys." He had his fist up and it was big and menaceing as he walked closer to Vernon on the street.

"I used to have a shiny Eevee but it is dead" Vernon said crying. "It was stepped to death by a garbodor!"

"Dragnon dragnon" said Dragnon.

"No I mean MONEY" Gary yelled. "Or valueable things"

"I have a dragonstone," he said showing the dragnonstone to Gary.

"That is just a dirty old rock" said Gary. "Where is the money."

"I used to have $20 from a sexy boy after having sex with his Dragonite! But I paid $15.38 for a microwave and $5.62 to the old man with emphysema for the dragon stone."

"That sucks" said Gary.

"Yeah, but at least I now have a dragonstone, a Heat Rotom, and also Dragnon."

"Can I challenge you to a battle" Gary said.

"YES" said Vernon all excited because this was his very first battle as a young trainer! "LET US BATTLE, DRAGNON I CHOOSE YOU."

Then Gary walked up to Vernon, and punched him in the face. Vernon fell to the ground and then Gary kicked Vernon four or five times in the chest, one or two times on the arm, six or seven times on the leg and once on the eyeballs. Then there was blood because Vernon's nose artery exploded and then nosebleed fell over the floor.

"OUCH" said Vernon as he cried as Gary beat him up and more blood splattered around the floor.

Then, Vernon fainted.

"What an easy battle. I win" said Gary, walking away.


	7. PREPARE FOR TROUBLE

HI EVEYONE SO SRORY FOR THE LACK OF UPDATES! I HAVE STILL BEEN IN SCHOOL FOR A LOT DOING MY RETAKE EXAMS AND STUFF, I HOPE I CAN REALLY PASS MY SCHOOL YEAR FINALLY. FINGERS CROSSED FOR ME, OKAY? CHEER ME ON IN A COMMENT OR SOMETHING! AFTER THIS SEMESTER ENDS FINALLY IT WILL BE THE SUMMER, BUT UNFORTUNATELY I HAVE TO TAKE MORE COURSES IN THE SUMMER BECAUSE OF THE REDO CLASSES :'( MAN LIFE CAN BE HARD SOMETIMES. THE MORAL IS THAT YOU HAVE TO STUDY HARD BECAUSE NOTHING IS FOR FREE AND THIS TUITION IS REALLY EXPENSIVE TOO.

ALSO RECENTLY A LOT OF THINGS HAVE BEEN WORRYING ME, LIKE MY PROSTATE LEAKING THINGS, BUT NOW I AM OKAY. AT LEAST THE PREGNANCY TEST TURNED OUT NEGATIVE SO THAT IS A RELIEF. A PART OF ME WISHES THAT I COULD BE A GOOD FATHER LIKE VERNON, AND HAVE A GOOD SON LIKE DRAGNON, BUT I SHOULD NOT GET TEEN PREGNANT SINCE SCHOOL IS IMPORTANT. SOMETIMES I WONDER WHY I AM DOING ALL THIS FOR. WHEN I AM SAD THOUGH, I READ THE LOVELY COMMENTS YOU LEAVE ME ON THIS FIC AND IT MAKES ME FEEL BETTER. I AM SO GLAD TO BE BACK ON FANFICTION, ESPECIALLY AFTER SO LONG. I LOVE YOU ALL AND ALL OF YOUR FUTURE GRANDCHILDREN. TRY NOT TO BE LIKE ME AND CATCH THE STDS, SUCH AS CHLAMYDIYA OR TRACHOMATIS. AS IN, DO NOT CATCH THE STDS. IT IS A CASE WHERE YOU GOTTA *NOT* CATCH THEM ALL.

 **OKAY WITHOUT FURTHER ADO HERE IS MORE OF THE FIC THAT I KNOW YOU HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING ANXIOUSLY FOR!**

* * *

Vernon was on the ground floor crying because gary had beat him up. His nose had stopped bleeding but all of his cloths were filled with blood from the kick, also his body was full of bruises.

He picked himself up from the dirt sadness where he had lain and shook himself upright.

He started walking forward limping because Gary had, aforementionedly, beat him up. Now he is blind in one eye because garys kicks had severed his left optic nerve and turned his left eyeball into eye juice. Eye juice dripped from his eyes along with his tears as he stumbled. Luckily he still had an other eye left, so he wasn't blind.

Suddenly there was a voice followed by another voice.

"PREPARE FOR TROUBLE."

"MAKE IT DOUBLE."

"JESSICA!" said the first person who was a girl.

"JIM!" said the second person who was a boy.

MEOWTH, said the meowth with mange.

"Oh no" said Vernon as he saw the Jessica, Jim and meowth with mange. He managed this with the remaining eye that still had an optic nerve in tact. "Your meowth has mange!"

"That's right" said Jessica who had long curly violet hair. Jim who had short blue hair nodded. The two of them were wearing paleish clothes that were sort of offwhite greenish, and a big red R in the middle of the chest place. This was hard to tell for Vernon, though, because he only had one eye okay left.

"Can you hear us out" said Jim. Vernon nodded as more eyeball juice overflowd from the behind of his eye socket and dripped across his face. "Our Meowth has mange, we are poor and don't have money to treat him."

"Oh no, I am so sorry" said Vernon as he held the place where his eyeball had been.

"We are trying to start a fundraiser" said Jessica. "Do you have any money."

"No, I have no money, gary beat me up because I don't have money and I still don't have money now" Vernon sadly said. He also winced because his eyeball still hurt.

"Do you have anything that can help? anything" said Jim.

"No I am so sorry" Vernon explained sadly to Jim, and also Jessica, and he was about to try to talk more when suddenly the Meowth with mange snuck up invisibly behind him, jumped up into the air and roundhouse kicked him in the back of the head, and then everything turned black.

He woke up with only one kidney.


	8. VOICE OF GUIDANCE

HEY HONEYBOOBOOPIIES! I AM SO EXCITED AND PROUD TO PRESENT TO YOU THIS NEXT CHAPTER OF: **VERNON DANFORTH'S GREAT LEAP FORTH!** IN CASE YOU DIDNT KNOW, THE FIC IS CALLED THIS WAY BECAUSE "VERNON DANFORTH" IS THE MAIN CHARACTERS NAME (*EVEN THOUGH I NEVER REFER TO HIM AS HIS LAST NAME, SO THIS IS TO CLARIFY IF YOU ARE WONDERING WHO OR WHAT DANFORTH IS). IT IS GREAT LEAP FORTH BECAUSE HE IS TRYING TO UNDERGO A **GREAT LEAP FORWARD** INTO THE COLLECTIVIST WORLD OF POKEMON ADVENTURES, BUT AT THE SAME TIME HE MUST GROW UP IN A COLD HARSH REALITY REALISING THAT THINGS DO NOT ALWAYS GO AS GOOD AS YOU WANT IN THIS PLANET. THIS STORY IS KIND OF LIKE ADVENTURE AND COMIMNG OF AGE (HA, HA, GET IT, COMING OF AGE BECAUSE VERNON IS SECRETLY UNDERAGE BUT SHHHHHHH DONT REPORT LANCE TO THE POLEECE BECAUSE HE MADE VRNON UNDERAGEDLY HAVE SEX WITH HIS DRAGONITE. GASP, WAIT, DOES THIS MAKE VERNON A TEEN FATHER? YES IT MAKES VERNON A TEEN FATHER, AND THAT IS PART OF WHAT IS SUPPOSED OTM KAE THIS FIC TOUCHING :') i am so sorry i did not explain this in the precious chapter when vernon was being pregnant, i thought it was clear to the readers but it is a mistake i made. :'( as for the rst of the things in the fic that you might not understand, such as why heat rotoms exist, please send me a PM! I LOVE YOU ALL MY DEA R READERS, NOW I WILL SHUT UP EVEN THO I INKOW YOU ALL LOVE LISTENING TO MY LITTLE STORIES ABOUT MY PERSONAL LIFE AND IDEOLOGIES :WINKFACEICON: :HEARTICON4:::

ONE LAST THING BEFORE CONTINUING I WOULD LIKE TO THANK ALL THE COMMENTERS SO FAR, ESPECIALLY TO SOCK PUPPET 1, SOCK PUPPET 2, SOCK PUPPET 3, SOCK PUPPET 4, SOCK PUPPET 5, SOCK PUPPET 6, AND SOCK PUPPET 7! WOW I AM SO EXCITED TO HAVE SO MANY NEW FANS. S/O TO SWIPING FOR GETTING BACK INTO HIS/HER/HIR/THEIR ACCCOUNT! S/O TO BACKPACK, BECAUSE YOU ARE BACKPACK AND YOU ARE AWESOME OOH YEA BABBY XXXXXXXXILUXXX~ AND A SECOND S/O TO BACKPACK BUT NOT FROM ME THIS TIME, FROM VERNON! VERNON SAYS HI TO YOU, BACKPACK, IN PERSON, AND JUST SEND A PM IF EVER YA WANNA RP! FINALLY A LAST S/O TO Vitya Falls, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABBOUT BUT I GUESS YOU JUST HAVE TO ASK BACKPACK, BOOT, SWIPER AND MAP PERSONALY TO KNOW.

OKAY FINALLY WITHOUT FRUTHER ADO THIS TIME FOR REAL, HERE IS MORE OF: _VERNON DANFORTH'S GREAT LEAP FORTH_

* * *

Vernon began to cry, because Eevee is dead, he had no money, and also he only had one kidney now. Tearblood slopped out from his left eyehole to be soaked in by the banadage that was on it, whereas his in tact right eye simply leaked tears. Everything hurted all over, he wanted to end it all, he wanted to disappear and make theings okay again but they would never be okay, poor Vernon who was the victim of fates and horrors of people taking advantage of him every moment of his life.

The dragonstone began to glow. Then the dragonstone glowed even more, but Vernon did not notice it through his tears and bandaged tearblood.

Vernon cried more until suddenly a voice intruppted him and made him look up with his remaining right eye.

"YO, DU" said the voice.

"h-huhuhh?" quivered Vernon's voice quivernigly. He was quite scared and alone, who was this talking to him?

"YEAH, DU, ITS ME" said the voice again. "LOOK DOWN, BRUH."

vernon looked down and saw that in his hands there was the dragonstone! How did it get there he did not know, but in his hands the dragonstone was glowing and also talking to him.

"THE WORLD HAS DONE YOU A LOT OF WRONG, BRUTHAR" said the voice of the dragonstone.

"it has" agreed vernon sadly while nodding.

"IT TOOK AWAY YOUR KIDNEY. IT MADE YOU BLIND IN AN EYEBALL. IT ALSO SEPARATED YOU FROM YOUR MOST BELOVED OF ALWAYS, YOUR SHINY EEVEE LOVER."

"yes it hasS" agreed Vernon and more tears flowed out of the moving words. He rememberd all the wrong that he world had done to him, and he was sad.

"YOU MUST BE SO MAD, AREN'T YOU" said the stone.

"well n-not really, I guess I am more sad than mad but…"

"NO!" chimed the stone. "BE MAD. FEEL THE ANGER. FEEL THE FURY RISE AND BURN INSIDE OF YOU LIKE HELL FIRE. YOU MUST EXACT REVENGE."

"revenge." Vernon repeated.

"YEAH, M8, REVENGE."

"Revenge." Vernon repeatd again.

"OKAY WELL, TO HELP YOU GRANT YOUR REVENGE, I WILL DO SOMETHING FOR YOU." Promised the stone.

"Oh boy really?" excited Vernon.

"I WILL GIVE YOU THE POWER OF MAKING YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE, AND SUMMON THE SPIRIT DRAGON WITHIN YOUR BOSOM'S CORE."

"REALLY?" worried vernon, thinking that this touching and beatufiul promise was far much too good to be ever true for someone as horrible and unlucky and sad as himself.

"REALLY" reassured the dragonstone.

And then suddenly Vernon felt warm all over, it was beautiful, he suddenly felt strong and able to face the world in all of its miseries… he would rise again, he would exact his revenge against all of the worngs and infidelities. He would track down Jesse, Jim and the meowth with mange and get back his kidney, he would go beat up Gary for destrokying his eye, he would also beat up the woman at the goodwill who took away his dragnons cloths, after this he would find the sexy dragon boy who made him have unconscensual sex with a dragonite and show him his underneath stitches that had ruined his underneathplace, and MOST OF ALL he would beat the elite 4 to avenge his beloved shiny stompsquashed eevee….!

"What is wrong with this kid" said the first Nurse Joy who was the nurse of the room and looking at the emergency resuscitated person on the bed of the Pokecenter Hospital.

"Yeah du what is wrong with him" said the second Nurse Joy who was the first Nurse Joy's colleague. "He's been crying and talking to a rock for the last five hours since a homeless man with gangrene brought him in through an ambualnce."

"I think he is having delusions" said the third Nurse Joy who was the colleague of the first two nurse joys.

"It is probably an acute phase complication of the clandestine unilateral nephrectomy practiced under substandard hygenic conditions" said one of the Nurse Joys, because they are really hard to tell from one another.

"Yeah du" said another one of the Nurse Joys.

Then they all left the room to get cannolis.


	9. A CANNOLI SPECIAL

HI GUYS, I AM RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS FOR VERNOND ANFORTH'S GREAT LEAP FORTH … :/ SO I DECIDED TO DO AN EXTRA SPECIAL CHAPTER, JUST FOR YOU ALL MY FANS! I.E. THIS IS LIKE, ONE OF THOSE FLUFF/POINTLESS/CUTE/ADORABLE CHAPTERS BUT JUST FOR THE FANS, LIKE I THINK THATS WHAT THEY CALL FANSERVICE BECAUSE THE POINT IS TO SERVICE YOUR FANS WITH YOUR WORDS! IHOPE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU HAVE BEEN GETTING GOOD SERVICE SO FAR WITH VERNON DANFORTH'S GREAT LEAP FORTH :')

S/O TO SOCK PUPPET 9 FOR YOUR REVIEW. I AGREE WITH **SWIPIPNG** THAT IT IS NICE TO HAVE FUZZIES IN YOUR BOSOMS CORE, REGARDLESS OF WHETHER YOU HAVE TO PEE IT OUT AFTER NEW FAN, **DARFUR MAX**! YOU ARE DA FUR TO THE MAXX! LAST NIGHT WAS AMAZING, BAE, XOXOX ;))) YOU ARE REALLY GOOD AT THE RP IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE [phone vibrate function]. WHAT DO YOU MEAN THOUGH VERNON IS JUST LIKE A REAL POKEMON FANFICTION PROTAGONIST. HE *IS* A REAL POKEMON FANFICTION PROTAGNONIST! :T PROTAGONIST AND PROTAGNONIST ARE NOT THE SAME THING. TO **BACKPACK** **2** : SORRY, BUT NO CIGAR. OR CANNOLI. :T ALSO BY THE WAY I WAS JOKING WHEN I SAID THAT THIS CHPATER WAS POINTLESS! ALL CHAPTERS HAVE POINTS AND ARE IMPORTANT, SO PLEASE R~&R MY FRIENDS I LOVE YOU ALLL~~~~~ OKAY SO NOW WE SHALL START WITH THE EXTRA CHAPTER'S SPECIAL:

***A CANNOLI SPECIAL***

Nurse Joy, Nurse joy and nurse Joy went to get their cannolis.

In order to get cannoli's, they went to the CANNOLI MART. A CANNOLI MART is like a POKE MART, except instead of selling Poke-things they sell cannolis of all kinds and sorts.

(A/N: I have decided to refer to the nurse joys with gender neurtral pronoms such as hir, s/he, sie, shi and ze Because it is kind of unfair that all Nurse Joys have to be women. This is because it is unfair that men don't get to be nurses in the pokemon universe!)

Therefore, Ze Nurse Joys went to the CANNOLI MART.

In the CANNOLI MART there were small cannolis, medium cannolis and large cannolis, but most of all there was cannolis. Ze walked together through the aisles of cannoli. It was a true cannoli heaven. Then ze walked out of the CANNOLI MART, all of zem having bought a cannoli.

"Hey aren't we forgetting something" said Nurse joy to the other two nurse Joys.

"What" said the first other Nurse Joy.

"Uh-oh" said the second other Nurse Joy who was finally realising what hir nurse joy colleague was meaning.

Inside the hospital again their patient boy Vernon was rubbing himself all over with the dragonstone. By that I mean rubbuing his peenus over the dragonstone masturbatorily. He ejected three times of gloopy seminar.

The end.


	10. WE MEET AGAIN

**A/N: AYYYYYY GUYYYSS S'UUUPPPPP READDY FOR ANOTHER CHAPTER OF: VERNON DANFORTH'S GREAT LEAP FORTH? WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS THE END? IT COULD NOT HAVE BEEN THE END NOW COULDN'T IT! HAHA, I FOOLED YOU ALL, SURPRISE. NO, THE STORY IS NOT DONE HERE. THERE WILL BE MORE CHAPTERS, MANY MORE AND THEY WILL BE GREAT AND WONDERFUL AND EASILY LOOKED FORWARD TO AS THE PREVIOUS!**

A SHOUT OUT TO ALL MY FANS WHOSE CONTINUED LOVE AND LOYAL SUPPORT HAVE BROUGHT ME WHERE I AM TODAY. THANKS TO YOU ALL I HAVE FAILED MY SUMMER EXAMS RETAKING, WHICH MEANS THAT I NOW OFFICIALLY FAILED MY SCHOOL YEAR. SO NOW I HAVE TO REPEATT THE YEAR AGAIN NEXT SCHOOL YEAR. WHEN WILL I GRADUATE EVER, I WILL NOT KNOW. BUT I WANT TO LET EACH AND VERY ONE OF YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS.

THANK YOU, AND IN EVER GRATITUDE, LET US BEGIN THE NEXT CHAPTER THAT YOU HAVE ANXIOUSLY BEEN AWAITING ATOP THE EDGE OF YOUR SEAT OR COUCH OR STOOL OR STOOLS:

* * *

Lance entered up the hospital elevator through the hospital floor into the hospital room that the nurse joys had forgotten to lock in their desperation to get to the CANNOLI MART. What was there was a Vernon, rubbing himself off on a dragonstones.

"Yo" said Lance.

"Ngh?" said Vernon as baby Vernon batter vernoned in pearly ropes across the off-white sheets. "OHMYGOD IT IS YOU, SEXYBOY" he suddenly yelled coming to awarenesss, realizing who that sexy boy was in front of him."

"By the way my name is lance" said Lance.

"HI SEXYBOY LANCE" now repeated Vernon. "Oh lance" he lamented "you do not know how many troubles I have had to experience after having sex with your dragonite for twenty bucks."

"Is that so? That is too bad, I am so sorry!" said Lance in a not sorry voice.

"I have one eyeball exploded and one kidney sold, except my shiny eevee is still dead!" Vernon yelled with sadness as he continued to off himself with the dragonstone.

"But vernon, why are you offing yourself with a dirty old rock?" said lance pointing to the dragonstone.

"It is not a dirty old rock it is a dragonrock!" retorted Vernon in sadness, at having his lover insulted. (A/N dragonrock is a synonym for dragonstone.) "And also it is because it feels good, unlike every all of the other experiences I have had to undergoing through in ALL OF THE PAST NINE CHAPTERS!"

"You started having sex with the stone in the last chapter" said Lance, accusedly, "should it not be eight chapters then?"

"Last chapter everyone got a cannoli except for me, that is a very valid and real source of sadness." complained Vernon.

"Yes that really is too bad" sympathized the sexy lance.

"you know after everything I have gone through," continued to complain Vernon while stopping to cough up a very large wad of phlegm with blood inside, which droped onto the bed beside the cumdrops. "I DESERVE AN AWARD. See I also now have tuberculosis I think which I caught from the other patient who had tuberculosis next to my bed beside me."

"You think?" said the sexy boy lance. "The universe is a cruel and unfair place inherently by design, and our human miseries mean nothing on the existential transcendent scale of metahpysics that we may not touch with our small earthly feeler fingers."

"really?" vernons unexploded eye shivered with the sadness. "no reward even after just waking up from a coma that could have resulted in my dead, and getting tuberculosis on top of everything?!"

"Wellllllll," thought Lance, taking pity. "YOU TRIED GOOD, vernon. That is your award."

"I get the award of the YOU TRIED GOOD PRIZE?" said Vernon with the sudden tearful joy of a five year old that found a old piece of candy on the floor in the room while waiting for mommy to finish using the toilet. "How much dollars is it worth?"

"Zero."

"oh."

"but hey sweetie baby" said the sexy boy lance. "if you have sex with my dragonite again I will give you a nother twenty bucks."

"I hate where this is going" acclaimed Vernon. "But I am really broke, so I need this."

"Hang onto my hand we will go into the great sky beyond," said Lance whipping out his pokeball of Dragonite, who crashed out of the pokemoncenter window to the bewildered look of the Nurse Joys just returned from the CANNOLI MART.

Into the sky, Lance and Vernon and Dragonite flew.

PLEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEE READ ANDD REVIEEEWWWWWWWWWWWW….. I AM GETTING INPATIENT


	11. A BRIEF INTERMISSION

Vernon held onto Lance holding onto Dragonite as they flew gently through the sky. The air felt cool and breezy. They passed over emerald-green valleys and under quartz-white clouds. Above, the brilliant sun warmed their backs with a gentle summer warmth. Suddenly, a question came to Vernon's mind.

"Hey, Lance?"

"What?"

"If Dragonite is flying, and suddenly it has to take a shit, what happens?"

"Then the shit drops from the sky, and splatters over the heads of everyone below who happens to be walking by."

"Oh… Okay."

"Dragonite," said Dragonite.

And, ever so gently, they continued their ascent into the blue.


	12. THE PLOT THICKENS

**IN A BRIGHT GREEN CLEARING SOMEWHERE**

Lance laid down Veron on the ground.

"do I really have to have sex with your dragonite?" sasked verno sadly.

"well, do you want the twenty bucks or not." Demanded Lance.

"Oh fiiiinnneee," sighed Vernon spreading apart his legs that did not have pants on them, showing to the world where his underneath stitches were from the birth of Dragnon. "C'mere Dragonite-sempai-san-kawaii-desu I am here waiting for you to make yummy slemon love~~~~~~~"

* * *

 **MEANWHILE IN THE POKEMON CENTER**

"Fuck you" said one Nurse Joy to another Nurse joy, who had just returned from CANNOLI MART.

"It is all your fault that you forgeot to lock the patient's door and that a guy with a Dragonite came in and exploded the hospital window," said the second nurse Joy beating up the other Nurse joy.

"windows are really expensive" said the Nurse Joy as ze continued to beat up the colleague Nurse joy.

"and now we have a patient missing" yelled ze other nurse Joy.

The Nurse Joy and nurse Joy left the body of the beated up Nurse joy on top of the hospital bed, who was so beated up that hir face was unrecognizable as vernons so that when their boss came they did not have to explain why a patient was missing.

* * *

 **MEANWHILE NOT IN THE POKEMON CENTER, IN SOME DARK DIRTY ALLEYWAY**

"wow" said Jesse, counting the cash $$$ in her hands.

"We made exactly $5750100 dollars, that is amazing" said Jim.

"Meowthwithmange that's right" said the Meowth with mange.

"even more than when we auctioned off a pikachu"

"now we have the money to buy a lot of cannolis at the CANNOLI MART!" yelped Jim with joy.

"What about my mange treatment" asked the meowth with mange.

"Im so sorry" said Jesseica. "we are too poor to afford your mange treatment, which is like the whole of three thousand dollars before tax."

"Yeah" said Jim. "This money woul be much better off spent on cannolis, they are such a better deal at only $2.99 per cannoli and $2.78 with the bulk buy discount but only $1.88 each with the super bulk buy discount if we spend all $5750100 dollars on them at once"

"THEN WE WILL BE RICH!" yelped Jesse most happily. "WITH CANNOLIS!"

"but what about my mange tratment….."

"$5750100 dollars, yes, is a lot," said Jim, "bu;t we will run out eventually. How do we make suer we get more money."

"Yeah Jim" said Jesseca, "come make up a plan quick."

"Um" thought Jim thoughtfully "well we can look at where we got the past $5750100 dollars and then go on from there."

"excellent" said Jesseca. "why dont we go fnid the boy. There is more kidney here that last kidney came from, which got us our $5750100 dollars."

"can we then afford my treatment please?" whimpered meowth with mange.

"maybe, we will see."

And they went off to try to devise find a way to make more vernon organ money.


	13. IT IS THE LEMON

A/N: HOLA YOLA YO FANSSSSSSS

THIS IS THE MOMENT THAT YOU MUST HAVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR FROM THE START

NO, IT CAN'T BE? YES, IT IS! IT IS IT!

THE HIGHLY ANTICIPATED, THE REASON WHY YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING ALL THIS TIME AWAITINGLY… THE ONE AMAZING AWAITED….

 **POKEHUMAN X LEMON LOVE !**

LET IT BEGIN. THE SEXUALLY IMPULSIVE BEAUTIFUL SEXINESSSSSS OH YEAH.

* * *

"Why are you filming me having sex with Draognite, though…" asked Vernon just as he was in the middle of having sex with Dragonite. It hurted because now the stitches of the underside from the birth of dragnon were becoming undone with the meat thrusts of dragonites difk.

"Dont mind me pretend I'm not here," said the hot sexy bae lance as he adjusted the cameras lens.

"Ya but you're spoiling the mood I wont wanna keep doing this if you keep pointing that camera at me" commented Vernon with insoloense.

"Sigh" sighed Lance. "It's because it is some peoples fetish, do you understand?'

"what does this have to do with me having sex with your drragonite and the video camera!" Vernon yelled as dragonites dragnite dic dicked Vernon in the hole.

"because I can post it on PokeTUBE and get lots of LIKES" explained Lance.

"oh" said Vernon and he continued having sex with dragonite. Now vernon held an eight-inch All-American Whopper Dong™ and thrust it into and outof dragonites dragonhole.

Soon dragonite was giving borth on top of the stone. It was half RealSkin silicone x dragonite! Unfortunately, that is incompatible with life and it was a stillbirth.

"Why the fuck did you film that too" asked Vernon, questionable.

Lance shrugged. "becaseit has to be SOMEONE'S fantasy out there."

"oh." said Vernon. "well okay whers is my twenty bucks."

"I am so sorry" said Lance. "I do not have the money on me right now, yes twenty bucks itis in my wallet but I cannot give it to you. I am very poor you see, my last submission of GARDEVOR LUCARIO TRAINER ORGY did not gain as many likes and donations as I wished."

"oh what no…" said vernon's face crestfallen.

"there may be a way though" said lance. "maybe I will reconsider giving it to you but only if you can win a pokemon battle against me!"

"WHAT NO I HATE POKEMON BATTLES I ALWAYS GET BEATEN UP EACH TIME" cried vernon with sadness, "YOU CANNOT DO THIS TO ME THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE INITIAL DEAL'S CONTRACT."

"well then too bad I will keep the twenty bucks I guess" said Lance. "also by the way" said lance now taking off his jacket and sexily flaunting his naked chest "I told you before my name is Lance, but I am also Lance of the elite 4"

Sudenly vernons eyes shined a miliion bright colors as he was still nekd and not yet done putting on his cloths.

"WHAT NO WAY! NOT *THE* LANCE OF THE ELITE 4" ! Vernon screamed ans sdreamed like a happy child.

"yup" said sexy lance as he put his camera into back his camerabag, happy that he would now have a great video for lots of PokeTUBE likes and money of underage human x pokemon x lemon.

"I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED TO BEAT THE ELITE 4! FOR MY ONE GONE AGO LONG TIME LOVE" as Vernon continued to begin to cry, since memories of his poor garbaordor squashed eevee resurfaced into a million pangs of sadness in his small bosom.

"yeah man if you want to battle me this much you could have asked earlier lol" said Lance putting his just sexed up dragonite backc inside his dragonball. "if you win and let me filim it I can give you the twenty bucsk so what do you say"

"OMG CAN I PLZ DO THAT NOW" yelled vernon"

"sure, just meet me in my ultra dragon dungeon" said Lance the sexy boy. and then Vernon followed Lacne nito his ultra dragon dungeon. 

* * *

WILL VERNON WIN. WILL VERNON LOOSE. IN THE NEXT CHAPTER STSAY TUNED EVERYONE. THERE WILL BE A BIG BIG BATTLE. IN THE BIG BATTLE WE WILL FIND OUT THE CULMINATION OF VERNON'S GREAT LEAP FORTH: CAN HE LEAP IT OR NOT!? IT IS HIS FINAL AND ONE CHANCE TO BEAT UP THE ELITE 4 OR BE BEATEN UP. WHO WILL WIN?

PLACE BETS! PLACE BETS ON WHO WILL WIN AND EACH WON BET I WILL GIVE YOU A S/O IN THE NXET CHAPTER GUYYZZZZZZZZ PLS COMMENT R&R, THIS IS REALLY IT, THIS IS GONNA BE THE CLIMAX SO GIME Y'ALL SOME HYYYYYYYPE! YERAH THE HYYYYYPE!

*HYPE HYPE HPYE HYPE!******* CAN YOU BELIEVE IT WE ARE ALMOST AT THE END SO STAY TUNED AND WAIT ANXIOUSLY FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER OF: VERNON DANFORTH'S GREAT. LEAP. FOOOORRRRRTHHHHHHHHH!


	14. SHOWDOWN

THIS IS IT, GUYS. HERE IS THE FINAL BATTLE. EVERYTHING THAT VERNON'S YOUNG TRAINER LIFES ABOUT TO CULMINATE INTO.

ALL OF THIS CULMINATES INTO TODAY IN THIS CHAPTER! SO CHEER ON VERNON FROM THE POKE-SIDELINES! WAVE THOSE POKE-POMPOMS LIKE A REAL SEXY #RECONSTRUCTIVESURGERY #VIRGIN #SCHOOLGIRL #ROLEPLAY #FOOTFETISH #BREASTS #BIG #HAIRY #TWELVEINCH #CAMEL #TOE #TIGHT #LOOSE #ASS #SOCKET CHEERLEEDER!

ONCE AGAIN I LOVE YOU ALL. I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUH I WOULD DONATE A KIDNEY TO EACH AND EVERYO NE OF YOU. SO KEEP ON REVIEWING THOSE REVIEWS, FAVING THAT FAVE, AND SHAKEING 'EMMMM POMPOMSSSSSS YEAAAAAA!

* * *

 **THIS WAS IT. HERE WAS THE FINAL BATTLE. EVERYTHING THAT VERNON'S YOUNG TRAINER LIFE WAS ABOUT TO CULMINATE INTO.**

Dramatic music begins to play in the background. They are in lance's ultra dragon dungeon which is basically a basement owend by his mother that he calls the ultra dragon dungeon, there are lots of chains and sexual object like llooking weird things all over it.

"I WILL WIN THIS BATTLE! FOR MY EEVEE ONE TRUE LOVE FOR WHOM I EMBARKD UPON THIS QUEST FOR AFTER SINCE IT WAS SQUISHED BY A GARBODOR" vernonn yelled.

Lance was standing all sexy in his super Dragon dungeon. Vernon threw his very virst Pokebla.

"GO, garbordor!" cried Vernon disgustedly yet reliantly since in times of need one will still have to collaborate with its own enemies to get to the point. "I HATE YOU, BUT GO ON. BEAT DRAGONITE"

"GARBODOR," GARBORWOR said, and it did not beat dragonite.

"DAMN YOU PIECE OF GARBAGE" Vernon yelled. The sexy boy lance and the sexy Dragonite winced because Vernon was being very loud. "YOU KILLED MY EEVEE. NOT ONLY THAT, YOU DID NOT BEAT DRAGONITE. YOU AR TRULY AUSELESS PEACE OF SHIT."

"garborwor…" sadly said GARBORWOR, which was sad and afraid and alone since this was the first time in months that it had gotten out of the ball and did not see its sexy human girl lover who had left it in the hands of this cruel underage mean child called Vernon.

"GO ON NOW DRAGONITE BEAT UP GARBODOR" started to cheer Vernon.

"Dragonite," said dragonite as it felled Garborwor with a hyper beam straight to the viscera, such that the garbage/trash type pokemon crumpled to the floor like a pile of trash.

"WELL TOO BAD LOL" laughed Vernon seeing that his worst enemy was now dead, he congratulated dragonite fro killing it. Now he turned to his other pokemon, his son (A/N I know we ignored him for most of the story so far but he was right there all along with vernin :3 so now he is back whoooo!)

"Go, Dragnon!"

"Dragnon!" said summoned Dragnon, Vernon x Dragnonite's child that was not stillborn this time around. Then dragnon started to run around the ground and hop up and down inc ricles.

"that is so weird, Dragnon what is wrong with you!?" yelled Vernon.

"I think it is going through puberty" commented Lance.

Suddenly Dragnon begun to glow! The glow got larger and larger enveloping the all of Dragnon! And suddenly Vernon could not see anything! And his son / half human half pokemon child suddenly changed!

 **CONTRATULAIONS** a voice suddenly from nowhere started to say. **YOUR DRAGNON EVOLVED INTO VERGNITE!**

"Vergnite!" said the newly evolved Vergnite, who had not only evolved but also just gone through puberty.

"Does this mean what I think this meanS?" said Vernon excitedly, "that he is now more powerful?!'

"no he just went through puberty, there is a lot of hormones inside of him now look" pointed Lance at Vergnite which had now started to masturbate itself against itself.

Then dragonite used hyperbeam and felled newly evolved vergnite with one move. VERNONS FIRSTBORN AND ONLY SON WAS NOW DEAD! (A/N the silicone dragonite stillbirth doesn't count, because there is not actual Vernons DNA)

No worries I still have Heat rotom, Vernon thought to himself as he released the machine haunting pokemon from the pokeball.

"GO HEAT ROTOM" Vernon said. But Heat Rotom did not move from the ground. It was not a Heat Rotom, just a microwave.

Vernon had no more pokemon!

Then the dragonite used a hyper beam and the hyperbeam hit Vernon. IT WAS SUPER EFFECTIVE. Vernon fell to the floor of the dragondungeon, as though he was dead.

* * *

HEY GUYS THIS IS THE SECOND LAST CHAPTER. AND THE NEXT CHAPTERWILL BE THE LAST CHAPTER. SO STAY PUT ON YOUR SEATS BECAUSE VERNON DANFORTH'S ADVENTURE IS ABOUT TO END AND PLEASE COMMENT AND REVIEW ! XOXOXOXOX


	15. THE END

HI EVERYONE

TO ALL MY DEAREST LOYAL FANS, INCLUDING DARFUR MAXX, VITYA FALLS WHOSE NAME IS NOW NO LONGER VITYA FALLS, SOCK PUPPETS 1 THROUGH 15, droma/dromarama, SWIPER NO SWIPING [MY CREDIT CARD], AND LAST BUT DEFINITELY LEAST, BACKPACK.

SO, LIKE YOU HAVE ALL SURELY EANTICIPATED FOR A WHILE. VERNON DANFORTH'S GREAT LEAP FORTH IS ABOUT TO COME TO AN END. OH NO, SAD IS IT NOT. HOWEVER, IT HAS BEEN SUCH A WONDERFUL FULFILLINGLY LEARNING ADVENTURE TO DO THIS ALONGSIDE YOU ALL

THANK YOU FOR YOUR GENEROUS TIME AND LESSONS AND THE REVIEWS

PLEASE KEEP FOOLLOWING US AT BACK PACKBOOTS WIPERMAP AT GMAIL DOT ORG !

BEST FANS WILL SEND US NAKED PICTURES ;))))))))

ARE YOU A BEST FAN!?

AND NOW…..

THE ADVENTURE MUST FINALLY COME TO AN END….

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO: ONE LAST TIME

* * *

Vernon blacked out, and the world became black.

But this black was not like the other blacks. It was a worst black, a bad black where everything hurt and you exist kind of no where and everywhere at the same time, it's hard to explain by someone who has never experienced it like me or you.

Then the black began to spin inside the blackness.

Slowly, the blackness became even blacker, sort of like a universal black, a black of truth and beyond the corporal. Vernon could no longer distinguish himself from the rest of the universal forces.

As the blackness began to spin it turned whiter and whiter, something pure and colorless almost. And as it all spun together, Vernon felt himself ascending, spiritually becoming lighter and wholer and clearer.

SUDDENLY there was sort of like this acceleration in the pure-light! He suddenly felt himself separateing from his own body, in a way. No longer was his body so bruised and broken, no longer did he missing one eyeball. Yes, his left eyeball had unbecome eye juice and his joints were supple as a preteen's. He became whole again, in a pure and overviewing way. He was light and full of force, he felt like he had the power to do or will anything.

Vernon saw the peoples he had once met, people so far from him.

He saw Vergnite after having just evolved from Dragnon before being hyperbeamed to death.

He saw lance sexy lance boy sex sex lance, but also the sadness and deception.

He saw the concerned faces of the nuers joys.

He saw the man and the woman and the meowht with mange who had stolen his poor lost alone kidney and sold it as a fundraiser for the mange.

He saw the old man of the dragonstone.

He saw the mean gary who had punched him once in the face, before kicking him four or five times in the chest, one or two times on the arm, six or seven times on the leg and once on the eyeballs thus severing his left optic nerve and turning his left eyeball aforementionedly into eyeball juice.

He saw the lady at the Goodwill who was not good willed to him, and he saw his Heat Rotom that wsa actually just a microwave.

He saw the dragonite of lance that he had made sweet human x pokemon love with ! And then he saw Dragnon as he came out of the womb, his own womb! And then his love of a father rushed into his eyes as he began to shed tears!

he saw the twenty bucks given to him by lance for having had the sex with the dragonite.

He saw the girl of the garbodor.

And finally he saw eeve, he cried, shiny eevee his beloved not in the form of a smushed pile but whole and free and bones unbroken, his shiny one true love EEVEE! ! ! !¿!everything for you evee I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE OKAY eevee I AM SO GLAD TO SEE YOU AGAIN WITH MY OWN EYES MY BELOVED LITTLE ONE!?¿!¿!¿!¡!¿¡EEVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!¡!¡ !¿¡EEVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!¡!¡

So then he runs up to his eevee that is wagging his/her/hir/their shiny tail and also running up towards him in return. And in his heart it became whole and happy again, pure eternal metaphysical and transcendent… a suprahuman happiness…

A small part of his extended universal being whispered to itself questioningly: is this the heaven? Is this hell? Is it the end?

And a voice began to speak to him. The voice said

"Do you want to go to heaven"

"Sure" said Vernon happily who might as well be in heaven since he is hugging Eeveei who is not squashed.

"Then you must know these four things."

"Okay"

" **First of all, you must know that you are a sinner."**

"Sure." said Vernon "I am a sinner"

" **Secondly, you must know that the penalty for sin is death in hell"**

"Sure," said Vernon "the penalty for sin is death in hell"

" **Thirdly, you must know that the Lord Jesus Christ paid the penalty for our sin."**

"Sure," said Vernon the Lord Jesus Christ paid the penalty for our sin."

" **The fourth thing that you must know is that you need to accept His payment for your sin."**

"Sure" said Vernon "you need to accept His payment for your sin."

And then the voice disappeared, now there was nothing elft but the glow overcoming all of his sensory suprasensory senses.

Yes this is the end, Vernon thought and the world turned purple-whitish-blue, becoming one with his own peaceful eternity….

* * *

A/N: *SOBBBB* I FINALLY DID IT IIT IS DONE…. VERNON DEAD… THIS IS THE END….. AND THAT CONCLUDES THE END OF VERNON DANFORTH'S GREAT LEPA FORTT.H….. CRY…. CRY WIWTH ME EVERYTONE TELL ME IF YOU ARE CRYING WRITE A COMMENT AND FAVE FOR EACH TEAR YOU SHED OOXXOXOXOXOX THANK YOU FOR YOUR DDARLING PATRONAGES. IF THERE ARE ANY COMMENTS OR CRITICIZMS OR FEEDBACK YOU HAVE, JUST DON'T HESITATE TO LEAVE US A COMMENT.

AND REMEMBER. BEST FANS SEND US NAKEDS.


	16. POSTSCRIPT

THE REAL END.

A/N. HAHAH I FOOLED YOU ALL OF YOU AGAIN NOW DIDN'T I. NOPE THIS IS THE REAL END. THE ACTUAL REAL END. AND HERE IT IS, NOW, IN AL OF ITS GLORY. THIS IS THE END. THE REAL END. THE END, THE END OF THE END, THE ENDING OF THE ENDING.

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO:

THE. END.

* * *

"WE DID IT" yelled Doctor Nurse Joy. "WE SAVED THE BOY FROM WHERE A PIMP FOUND HIM IN A DIRTY OLD BASEMENT OWNED BY SOMEBODY'S MOTHER"

Vernons quickened rapid shallow breathing stabilized and finally he began to breathe normal again.

The Surgeon Nurser Joy surgeoning on vernons brain cut off the last piece of a stitch thtat ze was stitching. "yup he is alive" confirmed the Surgeon Nurse Joy. This is by the way the same surgeon nurse joy that stitched the vernon's underside after vernon had given birth, it was a very skilled and inestimably good surgeon. ze had spent the last sixty five hours stitching the stitches and drilling vernons skull to get into the brain where the operation needed to be. with only three pee breaks. Now that is dedication.

"EVERYONE REJOICE VERNON IS ALIVE"

"BY A MAGICAL GREAT THING OF SCIENCE WE HAVE SAVED HIS LIFE. UNFORTUNATELY NOW HE IS QUINTUPOPLEGIC."

"that is a really difficult new word, I have never heard it before" said a nurse Joy in the room who was now taping together back vernons head, the same one who had once been beated up before and placed onto vernons bed and therefore was missing one eyeball bandaged with dripping eyeball juice. "I understand what quadroplegic is, it means you cannot move any of your four limbs including the arms and the legs. What is a quintupoplegic however?"

"men have a fifth limb" said hir Nurse joy colleague, that is all.

"oh."

"so that MEANS, mister vernon danforth will never walk again, or have erections."

"BUT HE IS AILVE. AND FOR THAT, WE MUST CELEBRATE."

"what do we do with him now?"

"he can now be discharged since the surgery is a success! his friends are there waiting for him downstairs at the lobby, I forget their names but one of them was a man, the other was a woman and there was also a meowth with mange."

"oh ok cool!"

And then they all went out to not just get cannolis, but to also group orgy with eaech other.

The [real] end.


End file.
